Thursday, March 5, 2009

Fear of Aging

My grandmother was not the friendliest person on earth. She paid little attention to me and rarely remembered my name. No, she certainly was not a huggy, kissy, sweet type of lady. I was afraid of her.

When I was a little girl I would look at my grandmother and shudder. She seemed so decrepit. I was probably about six. She was probably in her mid-sixties. I remember the deep purple veins that crept up her legs like spiders. Her nylon stockings pulled up to pudgy bulging knees. The dark circles under her eyes hunkered down next to her nose as she breathed heavily. Her sagging chin waved at me when she shook her head at me. But it was the underlying seething bitterness that frightened me the most. Her attitude was, "I am hateful and proud of it!"

YIKES! My little girl mind shrieked, "I hope I never look or act like that!" The thought of me be being like her was terrifying to a six-year-old's imagination. It still does make me pause and consider things about old age.

What scares you the most about growing old?

  • wrinkles

  • veins

  • age spots

  • bitterness

  • loneliness

  • weight gain/loss

  • anger

  • health issues

Well, sure enough, I am beginning to develop many of those scary physical characteristics. But I will not allow myself to become a cranky, bitter old woman. I am determined to age gracefully and more importantly to be grace-filled.

But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever! Amen. 2 Peter 3:18

Can I hear an "Amen!" ?


Margaret said...

Me too, Susanne. Keep reminding us!

Margaret said...

Susanne, I like the new look of your blog--especially all the "F" words. We are on the same page!

Leola Foster said...

My desire is to grow old gracefully. I have lots of comments to make here about the Joy of being a grandparent but don't we all want to pull out those brag books. One mf my favorite quotes: If I had known how wonderful it would be to have grandchildren, I'd have had them first. When my grandchildren leave my home I want them to leave with a desire to return, knowing I will be here to play... we play a lot.

Jennifer Hudson Taylor said...

Amen! I love this post. I've been meditating on the same thing. You said it perfectly.

Van said...

Oh Susanne, YOu will never be the old crankcy bitter lady you describe in your post! I just can never imagine it - but thanks for reminding us because bitterness and crankiness can come at any age with any circumstance. I never want to be bitter and cranky - not today not when I am older.

Terry said...

Suzanne I really love your blog. This is the first time visiting here and you are speaking my language. I'm a 45 year old mom of 5...3 in thier 20's, a 3 year old adopted son and also a 2 year old on the way! It a crazy contrast...oh, it didn't mention my 2year old grandson.

I don't think I'm always confortable with getting older knowing I still have little ones...I'm not allowed age, right? They do keep me smiling though!

Laurie Ann said...

A hearty amen to that!

You have a beautiful blog. I am stopping in after reading your devotion on authentic faith. I loved it.

seesawfaith said...

Definately health issues, as well as mental ones. I had a grandmother suffer with dementia and it was a horrible thing to watch, as well as experience.

My mom died after a lengthy battle with cancer.

I have no idea which is worse. They both scare me. Ugh. I hate even thinking about aging.

Wendy Blight said...


I too have fears about aging based on what I observed in my family. But I know the most delightful 75 year old couple here in Charlotte. They are vibrant and active, still serving the Lord with all their heart, soul, and mind.

How I want to be like that when I am in my and available to be used by the Lord. Spending time with them leaves me refreshed, renewed, and energized to seek God more and serve Him more. Their names are Sam and Olive Cornwell. May God continue to bless their health and use them for the glory and honor of His Kingdom.

Love you,