Friday, March 7, 2008

A God who Sees

I grew up in northern Utah. My hometown was small and behind the times. (Even today, it appears to be caught in a time warp of the 1950’s.) When I was growing up, the town was predominately populated by Latter Day Saints, more commonly known as Mormons. Mormons hold strong moral ethics. They stress exceptional family values in order to be able to be in a good relationship with God.

Oh, boy! That left me believing I would never be close to God. A fourth generation alcoholic, he had no clue how to be a faithful husband or a good father. He would disappear for days only to come home in a drunken stupor. Family dysfunction and spiritual darkness hovered in our home.

My mentally ill mother spoke in garbled phrases of schizophrenic fear. She loved me desperately and tried her best to care for me. However, life centered around the committee of voices she heard in her head. The confused and scared little girl in me believed that God didn’t see what happened in my home.

However, my impression of God’s eyesight was mistaken. He doesn’t need contacts, glasses, or eye surgery to see invisible little wallflowers in the dredges of life. God sees every little girl, in every circumstance, everywhere. He is El Roi, the God who sees.

She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: "You are the God who sees me," for she said, "I have now seen the One who sees me." (Genesis 16:13 NIV)

He saw me.

To be continued on Monday.

1 comment:

Melissa said...

Susanne,

As I read your post today, I realized I don't know much about your life. When we see each other, it's so brief and busy. I love these blogs for that reason. We can share life and learn so much about ourselves and each other. I can't wait to read your continuation on Monday.

Miss you!
Melissa